Loving Through Racial Unrest


There are many challenges relationships face on a daily basis – lack of intimacy, poor communication, grief, financial crisis, and more. How we handle challenges creates resilience, understanding, and a deeper bond. ON top of what is happening in America, interracial couples have to step back and soul search for understanding and collaboration to maintain the love they have built together to stay strong.

In these next few minutes, I will give you a few tips to help you navigate your emotions and mental state while enduring these changing times.

Many of us hear a relenting dialogue that replays a loop of dread and despair in our minds. We have watched it all play out on television and we are in distress. Others have the ability to stay positive and see the sunshine and rainbows of tomorrow’s promise. Why? because they have taken to heart 3 simple tips:

Accept that Change is inevitable. The world is constantly evolving. And in the encouraging words of a dying Doc Holiday in the movie Tombstone when he advised Wyatt about love, he said “there is no normal, there is just life. Now go and live it. Grab that actress and live Wyatt, live for me.”

We can’t choose who we love but we can embrace the changes that we are experiencing and see the beauty in the opportunity for growth. If you accept these thoughts you will be more at peace with the chaos around you.

I am married and it’s interracial. We have discussed what’s going on and Mr. George Floyd’s death and politics, but what remains at the center of it all is respect and the love we share. We can have an open dialogue about how he feels and his thoughts about actions and anger expressed on TV and then I take a turn but our goal is to understand how we think and see things so that we have clarity. 

Settle your mind – Our emotional and mental state can get turned upside down in a situation that hits us out of the blue. However, you can take the wheel after the initial awareness. Steering your focus to more pleasant and inspiring thoughts and activities instead of ones that lead you down a dark and gloomy pit of despair. Asking yourself the question – What now? It gives you a moment to consider the next steps and a glimpse into your future after this event.

Worry and fear will ring misunderstanding. We have all been cooped up in our homes due to the pandemic and now we are forced to examine our views on race. It can be overwhelming but there is clarity in all this. One way to get clarity and settle your mind is to communicate. Ask about how your partner feels about the racial unrest and their views on various aspects. I know its like talking politics, but be fair in your back and forth and allow them the space to discuss their feelings and views and vise versa. Put your love for each other first and have an open mind to see perspectives from both sides.

Reset your emotional state – We process experiences differently. Some experience sadness and for others, anger. But it should not stop us from moving past these feelings and back to enjoying laughter and fun times with those we love and others. Resetting your emotional state is one way to step back and examine the feelings you are experiencing at any given time to see just how we are processing them. What sparked the anger? Sadness?  Is at its core something that has been lingering? If we take a moment and realize it was the tone of voice that seemed accusatory or that you are just having a bad day, you can remove yourself from a meltdown and recover to shift into a happier you. I know for me it is better that I get it out. Much like a song that is stuck in your mind. Sing it completely and then it ends the looping in our head. If you feel sad, don’t ignore it, have a good cry or talk with someone who will let you express your anger without interruption and they will serve as a sounding board for you to get it out and maybe even work out why you were angry or sad and resolve it for the future.

There is no 123, ABC through all this, but if we take steps towards understanding and love we can get through it all in a better place.

Converting Content to Cash for a More Abundant and Resilient Life

Want to EASILY infuse your business with a chunk of cash – NOW and far into the future? I have a special guest who cannot only tell you how to do just that but can help you get it done pain-free and quickly. This episode of #ResilientLivingTV I present Paulette Ensign who is an expert on Tips Booklets and supporting products for your business, be it as an author, speaker, service provider, manufacturer, and more. Watch or listen as she shares great insight to help you use what you’ve got and expand your career and business’ resilience


The Resilience of Unlabeling

We all have labels placed upon us and we accept some and reject others as we evolve in this thing called life. In this episode of #ResilientLivingTV, Dr. Kat Smith speaks with Dr. Cara Tucker who shares with us her theories surrounding labels in her book Unlabeled where she takes her readers into the depth of the psyche with elements of practical advice and checklists to the journal for further exploration. Join us for some insight into owning or letting go of labels.



3 Steps to Creating Change

Living Resiliently requires evolving as life happens. As life changes so must we. How we change is most important. With today’s challenges, we have to seize the opportunity to create change that fits our life vision. Here are 3 steps to Creating Change.



3 Steps to Creating Change

In today’s challenges of rattled politics, abuse of power, harassment and assault, inequality, racism, and the list goes on, we are overwhelmed and need inspiration, reconciliation, answers, healing, respect, and a plan for change.

Considering that we all have our own perspective of happiness, success, peace, etc, we can all agree that in order to gain the space where we feel in harmony with the life we have to take steps to invite balance and understanding with observation and less reaction.

Taking heart and motivation, we can open up to change we then create resilience with a few tips:

Embrace Collaboration
I prefer collaboration over compromise, why? Because to me, when there is a compromise, someone loses. But, when there is collaboration, there is a joined effort to bring about a mutually desired outcome.

“I can do things you cannot, you can do things I cannot; together we can do great things.” Mother Teresa

We all have gifts and talents that we can use and share to help ourselves and others. Knowing your strengths and weaknesses is valuable in having the ability to delegate tasks that are best performed by you or another who is better suited. I am not a plumber and have no desire to be. I hire one to do the work I am not skilled or want to do.

“No one can whistle a symphony. It takes a whole orchestra to play it.” – H.E. Luccock
When I am relieved of those tasks, my time is freed up to concentrate on doing what I love, enjoy, or skilled in doing. This reduces stress and feelings of overwhelm and frustration.

Embrace Self Control
We only have control of ourselves and if you change yourself you take a step towards the changes the world needs.

“You must be the change you want to see in the world.” Mahatma Gandhi

By first acknowledging or identifying what changes need to take place, we can implement a plan to install those changes and bring about our desired outcome.

“The great secret of getting what you want from life is to know what you want and believe you can have it.” Norman Vincent Peale

Any idea begins with a thought or an inner vision. How your vision plays out for you can be manipulated by your thoughts and beliefs. Change begins in you when you investigate your thoughts and beliefs and adjust your perspective or views to align with your outcome.

If you have been feeling out of sorts you can design more balance and harmony by BEING balanced and in harmony with your self and your life. This one step is key to bringing about the change we seek.

Embrace Living
Detach from the virtual world and get back to real life. There truly is a loneliness epidemic because we are less engaged with each other and with nature. Our world is suffering as we. Climate change and mood changes are resulting in life destruction. We are killing each other and the planet, whether you believe it or not changes are occurring. Just look at the number of school shootings.

“Life is a song, sing it. Life is a struggle, accept it. Life is an opportunity, benefit from it. Life is beauty, admire it. Life is a dream, realize it. Life is a challenge, we must take it.” Mother Teresa

If we can only take a few moments a day and get out of our heads and devices, we can get back to what is important in our lives; family, love, health, nature and what it provides, and our spirituality. Affording time to dedicate to what is important in your world bring benefits that support the balance and harmony that is highly sought after.

“There are ultimately two choices in life: to fight it or to embrace it. If you fight it you will lose – if you embrace it you become one with it and you’ll be lived.” Rasheed Ogunlaru

Woices App


Woices, an app that drastically improves information flow between employees and management for insights, idea sharing, feedback, and compliance reporting without fear, hesitation, or embarrassment. It revolutionizes employee engagement and participation.

Created by a woman – Sonali Siddha
Today I talk with Co-founder and COO Gunjan Siddha about Woices.